Not Just Steak Any Longer

I imagine anyone who has been to a Steak 'n Shake in the past 12 months or so has noticed the sweeping changes that have been made to the menu. As far as I can recall, Steak 'n Shake had the same menu from the time I was a child until about a year or a year and a half ago. However, now if you go in there, the menu items are entirely different.

Fortunately, the number of steak burger and melt varieties is close to the same, as well as the chili variety. However, now they offer a vast array of other selections, some good and others not so good. I remember as a kid you had your choice of chocolate, vanilla and strawberry milkshakes. In my teenage years, they added chocolate chip, cookies 'n cream, and a few other flavors. Now there's something in the range of 8,000 (probably an exaggeration) different varieties of milkshake, if you include the side-by-side shakes. And that's just the beginning.

Who the hell thought of putting hot dogs on the menu?? Now, I guess I shouldn't judge until I've tried them, but they have something like 10 different types of hot dogs, most of which weren't available last time I was in there. I mean, the menu keeps changing!! Just today I saw about 6 items on the menu marked as "New."

Another big one on the menu is the "Shooters." Are tiny burgers the new fad in food distribution? I don't know where these things started, but you can now get mini burgers at just about any restaurant, even KFC!! I have to admit the "New" buffalo shooters are damn good. I've been on a buffalo kick lately. I've had probably 15 "buffalo" themed meals in the past 2 weeks. I can't get enough of the stuff. So when I saw the buffalo shooters on the menu, I had to get 2 of them. So right now, I have 2 buffalo shooters, a ketchup and onion shooter, an order of fries, and 2 Cheesy Gordita Crunches in my stomach. I can't wait until tomorrow.

So anyway, is the new menu a good thing or a bad thing? Personally, I think it's a bit strange, and Steak 'n Shake definitely doesn't feel the same as it did when I was a kid, or even when I was a teenager. I've also done a bit of research and found out that Steak 'n Shake is planning on vastly expanding its franchise availability in the next 5 years, so we may see these new, different Steak 'n Shakes popping up all over the country. In closing, I have to admit, the food is still pretty good if you're in the mood for a sit-down fast food type atmosphere.

A Crowded Shopping Center

So on a regular basis, I drive past this shopping center that's on a major road here in Louisville. It's not a big shopping center, and it's not in a great area of town (not a bad area, just not great either). Anyway, I often drive by this shopping center at 1-2 AM, sometimes earlier, sometimes later. I've noticed that most nights after 10PM the parking lot of this shopping center begins to get very crowded. And once midnight hits, you can't find a parking spot...seriously. Between the hours of midnight and 4 AM this shopping center is pretty much a hub of activity. So what's in this shopping center that draws such a late night crowd? Is it a bar, a club...a strip club? Perhaps something a bit more shady? None of the above.

This shopping center is the home of none other than Bingo City!!

Now I had to do a bit of research on this place because I had no idea what was going on, or how a place like Bingo City can draw that kind of crowd after midnight. Well, I looked it up and discovered they have several sessions. They have weekday and weekend sessions at 2 PM, 4 PM and 7:30 PM. But they also have Monday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday sessions beginning at Midnight. Yes, they have midnight bingo!! Now, I don't imagine this place is unique. I'm sure there was a place like this somewhere in St. Louis, probably within a few miles of where I grew up...but I never saw it.

Now I'm not going to go into too much detail about the schedule of this place or what all they do because I don't know what all the terminology of professional Bingo. But I looked further and further into what seemed like a pretty small website, and found links to Bingo halls all around the city. I was floored by this. There were dozens of them. Again, I realized Bingo is a big time game amongst the geriatric population, but do they really get out their doors at midnight for an all-night Bingo orgy? I guess so. Anyway, here's the link to the site. If I ever have the patience and testicular fortitude perhaps I'll venture into this center of elderly bliss.

As a final note, I've mentioned the Angry Video Game Nerd on several occasions. Well, the creator of that series is seriously a comic genius, so I've attached a brief clip from his website that's fantastic.

Some More Thoughts

This is my one more update saying I'm going to do better at updating. We'll see, but I've just finished another round of schooling and that took up a lot of my free time over the past year so maybe things will be better. A couple of thoughts, and an update.

First off, even though Halloween season is over, I urge everyone who enjoys Halloween and horror movies to keep it going for a bit longer. I mean, until December, what do we really have to look forward to...Thanksgiving? It's an ok holiday, but I've never been a fan at all. It's a boring day in my family and has gotten even more boring since I moved to Louisville. I love spending time with my family, but sitting in the house all day with them and nothing else to do gets to be too much. And everyone else I know always has plans, so what's there for me to do. On the plus side, I can almost guarantee a StLouisville post that day because I'll have very little else to do. So I know I personally am going to celebrate Halloween until December. I just may watch a horror movie tonight.

In anticipation of a likely shitty winter, I've braced myself for an early start. Needless to say I've been pleasantly surprised with how things have turned out so far in November. Into the past week, I've still seen bees and mosquitos alive outside, and that's rare at this time of year. And it's still supposed to get into the 60's next week so things are looking up for the near future.

The Third Annual Krispy Kreme race has been postposed due to a scheduling conflict. I'm not sure if it will be postponed for a day or for 2 weeks, but it is guaranteed to happen very soon. I mean, it's supposed to be 61 and sunny on Saturday. The last two times this has been done, it's been like 30 degrees and windy. I hate the winter weather, but this is an event that just doesn't seem right unless the weather is horrendous.

And finally a major update. I intend to keep StLouisille online for a great long while, but I've also come up with a great idea for a new blog. It's going to be a weekly update (maybe sometime bi-weekly) with a very narrow focus. I'm actually going to go ahead and set up the site right now and put the thing in motion. The plan is to get 4-5 weeks ahead before I put it officially online around the first of the year, but I'm really looking forward to this one. I only had to wait until I was out of school because this was going to require a very small weekly investment on my part and I had no money (still don't but I should very soon). I'll post the link, as I said, right around the first of the year.

Going Too Far

I don't know how often I've mentioned them, but I know for a fact that my hatred of Nickelback has popped up several times in this blog, notably in my Pop Evil post and my stereotypical Facebook profiles. Well, I've just found a Facebook group that fits me perfectly. I have now become a "Fan" of "Not Listening to Nickelback." While I haven't explored this page on Facebook too much, I've seen some stuff I like. And the group has over 15,000 fans so I know I'm not alone. Now I have an outlet (besides this blog) to vent my anger and dislike of one of my passionate hatreds in life.

However, I did find a disturbing video on this Facebook page that I think needs to be mentioned, and it actually brings Nickelback up a level in my eyes, from incredibly shitty up to mostly shitty. The video is of the group performing at a metal festival or something (yes Nickelback performed at a metal festival that was headlined by Slipknot). They got 2 songs in and when singer Chad Kroeger tried to talk to the crowd, he got virtually no reaction. When he turned his back to get ready for the next song, someone pelted him in the head with a rock. Now I hate Nickelback, but that's just wrong. As far as I've read, they were thrown a lot of money to perform at this festival, so you really can't blame them for taking the payched and playing where they don't belong. And throwing rocks at people is going too far. No one deserves that treatment, no matter how shitty and untalented they are. Anyway, Kroeger's reaction was pretty good. He just says, "See ya," and walks off the stage. However, just before he gets out of sight, he gives the crowd the finger. Probably as good a reaction as one could have, and I found it amusing. Much better reaction than when Guns 'n Roses walked off the stage in St. Louis years ago. I think G'NR actually put something like "Screw you St. Louis" somewhere in one of their CD cases. Anyway, I've included the video because I thoroughly enjoyed Kroeger's reaction. Some fans really need to know when they are crossing the line and going too far. Idiots.

Who Doesn't Like Tacos?

I've always been a huge fan of our American version of Mexican food that can be found at fast food restaurants like Taco Bell. And while I will always enjoy Taco Bell, I can't claim that it is the best of the fast food "Tex-Mex" restaurants. Now I can't talk intelligently about all restaurants like this because my experience with them is limited. However, I do have to give mention to Taco Tico which, after several years of looking at it and driving by, I finally tried over the weekend.

I can't even begin to describe this experience, but I'll try. My order (for 2 people) consisted of an order of nachos and the #2, which consists of 2 tacos, a sancho, and a large drink (Dr. Pepper, of course). As I had never been to Taco Tico, I chose the Green Chili sauce instead of mild, medium, hot or volcano. I think this was all a good choice. The meat in the tacos, which is I'm sure of a low quality, still tasted fantastic and put Taco Bell's meat to shame. The tacos themselves were stellar, and the green chili sauce gave them a suitable kick. The sancho was also fantastic, and quite large as well. A sufficient meal would have been a sancho and 1 taco, but I finished both tacos and my sancho, and probably half the order of nachos. The nachos, most notably the queso, were beyond description. From the chips, to the meats, to the queso, these were just perfection in the form of a pile of nachos. Taco Tico, I salute you. If you have one near your house, check it out at your earliest convenience.

However, I have to give Taco Tico a silver medal, because the gold goes to Taco Tierra. I actually just found out that there are several locations throughout Southern Illinois and Southern Indiana, including those in Evansville and Princeton, IN. However my only experience is the one in Fairfield, IL. Since I can't describe this place well, all I'm going to say is this. If you're ever driving through Southern Illinois on Interstate 64, stop at exit 110, drive about 10 miles north toward Fairfield and stop in at the local Taco Tierra. I believe it's somewhere on Main Street...either way, it's easy to find. Order a sancho with mild sauce, and think of me as you enjoy the flavor overload you've just experienced.

The Least Shitty of Them All

I posted about this last year and I'll do it again today. October has begun and that's a bittersweet thing for me. I hate fall and winter. But of all the fall and winter months, I find October to be the least shitty (followed closely by December). This is because I am really into holidays, and Halloween and Christmas are awesome. The reason October is over December is because of the weather. I hate cold weather, and at least it's October and I can still wear shorts.

Halloween is amazing. Horror movies and Halloween candy make it a highlight of my year. On Cinemassacre.com, one of my favorite websites, James Rolfe (aka The Angry Video Game Nerd) is doing "Monster Madness" which means he will post a horror movie review every day. I have been accumulating horror movies all of September in anticipation of a great October. I can't wait.

But October isn't just about Halloween. It means Pumpkin Season has also begun!!! I am passionate about this, as I proved with my post last year. And once again, assuming I don't get sick again, I plan to consume a pumpkin item every day from now until December 1. I don't know if it will happen, but I intend to give it the old college try.

Today the International Olympic Committee is voting on the location of the 2016 Olympics. Being pathetic as I am, I'm watching the voting live on universalsports.com. I have to be honest, it's painfully boring. I wish I had gotten up for the final presentations before the vote, but my first day off in a month meant excessive amounts of sleep were more important than anything.

Well fuck, just as I'm typing this, Chicago is the first of the 4 cities eliminated from the Olympic voting. Just shows you that once again, the international sporting community hates America. That's why sports like baseball are no longer on the Olympic program. And to think, Chicago was really one of the 2 favorites today.

The Stereotypical Facebook Profile: Conclusion

I just kept putting off this post because I always do better posting on the fly and not really planning what I'm going to write. So somehow, knowing what I needed to write actually deterred me from writing...F'ed up, I know.

So I guess I ended with TV shows, which always angered me. But what people put for their favorite movies pisses me off almost as much. First off, there are several movies on everyone's lists, Old School, 40 Year Old Virgin, Wedding Crashers, Talladega Nights, Superbad,I have a serious problem with people who see a brand new movie once and claim it's their "favorite movie of all time." Screw that!! All of my favorite movies are at least 3 years old, meaning I've had plenty of time to watch them, analyze them, and compare them to other classics on my list of favorite movies. I really enjoyed "The Dark Knight", but it's not my favorite movie. I've seen it twice. Can I really call a movie I've seen twice my favorite? However, when looking at the list I put on the "Stereotypical Facebook Profile", one would have to look closely to see the real humor. The last several of those movies hadn't even been released when I posted that profile, including: The Hangover, The Taking of Pelham 123, The Proposal, Year One, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Some people are stupid enough to put a movie down as their favorite based solely on hype and trailers. Idiots!! One thing I will say is that I will make an exception for "The Hangover" because that movie was phenomenal.

Favorite books. I get so damn pissed when I see people making fun of reading on their Facebook profile. Do people not realize that reading a damn book every once in a while will keep your mind sharp, and is a great substitution to all that TV that they supposedly don't watch. Don't make fun of reading just because you don't have the intelligence to sit down with a book. There are people in this world who still do it, and they're smarter than you!!

Favorite quotes: I don't really remember why I put those first two quotes other than the fact that most people put something stupid that is totally unrelated to their own lives just to make themselves look deep. Then they always throw in a poem or an entire damn song, again to make them look like deep thinkers!! Guess what, assholes?? You look like idiots putting entire songs for your "favorite quotes." A quote is an excerpt, not an entire song. If I had the space, I would put my favorite quote as the entire script for "Back to the Future" on my Facebook profile just to top all those deep thinking assholes and their favorite quotes.

About me: Another place to put an entire song and make you look smart and deep. Once again, you just look like an asshole. Just put a short description or a link to your MySpace page or something. Don't pretend that Kenny Chesney or Taylor Swift wrote an entire song just for you. Whatever song you put that supposedly describes you for your "About me" section was written for the sole purpose of making money, and is in no way about you. I thought it was fitting that the song I used was in fact, "Songs About Me" by Trace Adkins. (No I did not know off the top of my head that it was Trace Adkins, I had to look it up. I do not enjoy country music).

Finally, Facebook Groups. This was kind of fun to write because there are so many damn groups that everyone is a part of. All of the 1,000,000 strong groups, or the "6 degrees of separation" groups are amusing. My favorite, however, are the groups people join that basically say, "I Hate Facebook." Why the hell would you be a member of Facebook, only to join a group that says you hate it. You don't hate Facebook, otherwise you would not spend all of you supposedly limited free time (that time not spend "chillin', watchin' TV, and hangin' with friends) on Facebook.

So I hope this was enlightening to all of my loyal followers. Sorry for the long delays. I will work on doing a better job of making some shorter, more regular posts. Good day to all of my followers.

The Stereotypical Facebook Profile: Explanation

I know I posted this a long time ago, but I truly planned on making my Facebook post a 2-part series, one with the actual post and another with the following explanation. But I got sidetracked, first by Michael Jackson's death, and then by a ton of damn work that had to be done, along with moving and losing internet access for 2 weeks. So now, the long awaited explanation of my Stereotypical Facebook Profile.

First off, I think the motivation for the post needs to be explained. It had been my intention to actually do this on my own Facebook profile, but I was afraid no one would get it unless I posted it somewhere else less serious. I had noticed so many similarities in profiles, and so many of them seemed so fake that I decided to call people out on it. I'm not saying that having one, two, or even like 5 of these things on your profile makes you an asshole, but if you look up and down this profile and see over half of them on your Facebook page, you are officially a tool and should either delete your profile, or consider a change of lifestyle.

First, I need to start with the picture. No, this is no one I know. I just typed in "tool surrounded by girls" into google, and this was one of the first pictures to pop up. This is because half of the pictures of guys you see on Facebook, they are surrounded by girls. As if this is the story of their lives and all they ever do. I figure the guy in this picture probably has a camera he takes to every party he goes to and makes it a point to get a picture taken with every girl there (unfortunately I've known people to do this). Then he sends the pictures home, as well as posts them on Facebook, showing all his friends and family back home: "LOOK AT ME! I have friends...and they're GIRLS!!!" Loser.

Next, did you know everyone on Facebook is a political genius, and their political views are meant to be known and examined by everyone. It was no worse than during this past November's election. Everyone posted when they voted and who they voted for. Isn't voting supposed to be a private thing, not meant for the masses to know. Shut up about your fucking politics, I don't care!!!

Next, the activities and interests. How the hell many different ways can you say that you like to sit around and not do shit. Just say hanging out, don't indulge us with 10 different ways of saying the same damn thing. You have friends who you like to hang out with, I get it. Just say you like to hang out. And this shouldn't take up all of your activities and interests. Don't you have anything else you do in your life? I guess not...you're spending too much time "chillin" and screwin' around on Facebook.

Also, I've noticed that the letter "G" is at a premium on Facebook. No one says "hanging out", or "chilling." G's have been replaced by apostrophe's, such as chillin', relaxin', chillaxin'. Finish your damn word you lazy bastards!!

Music. Most people on Facebook are actually closet musical experts. Somehow, they like every kind of music, but then they list genres they don't like. However, when you go into their favorite bands and favorite songs, they have bands from within the fucking genre they said they hate!! WTF?? My favorite is when people add a band as one of their favorites because they know one song by the band. I think I say this in part because I like 80's music so much, but the average Facebook user only has a vague knowledge of 80's bands. So they put Def Leppard or Journey as their favorite bands because they like "Pour Some Sugar On Me" and "Don't Stop Believing." And on top of this, it seems that the world is obsessed with Nickelback. I HATE Nickelback, but they show up on everyone's favorite music list. Fucking assholes!!!

Well, this post is getting long, so I'll end this and continue later, but not before I discuss the TV shows category. This one was easily my favorite to write because of how big an asshole everyone is when they write this section. The average Facebook user somehow believes they cram 36 hours of activities into a 24 hour day. So this being said, no one believes they have time to watch TV. "I don't watch much TV" is one of the biggest fucking cliche's out there in this generation. MY ASS!!! It's because of today's high school and college students that there are so many crappy shows on TV...you fucking watch TV whether you SAY it or not!! The average Facebook profile starts out with that one line, "I don't watch much TV." Then they proceed to list 15 of their favorite TV shows, which they watch regularly. News flash assholes: if you have time to watch that many different weekly TV shows, then you watch A LOT of TV!! Get over yourselves, you aren't more imporatant than the rest of the world, and your lives are definitely not busier.

To be continued...

Michael Jackson: 1958-2009

The Stereotypical Facebook Profile

Name: John Q. Facebook

Basic Information:
Networks: Louisville, Ky
Sex: Male/Female
Birthday: 1/1/1990
Interested in: Women/Men
Looking for: Dating, friendship, a relationship.
Political Views: My way is the only way.

Personal Information:
Activities: Hanging out, chillin' with friends, cruisin' with my buds, playin video games, sports, rollin' with my posse, workin' out, relaxin' with my pals, chillaxin.

Interests: meetin' new people, partyin', music, video games, women (men), and just about anything else I can do in what little spare time I have.

Favorite Music: I like just about anything....except rock, country, rap, pop, R&B, blues, jazz, ska, oldies, bluegrass, opera, techno, musak. Favorite bands are Dave Matthews, Nickelback, Keith Urban, Nelly, Justin Timberlake, Journey, Rascal Flatts.

Favorite TV Shows: I don't have time to watch much TV, but when I do, I like Grey's Anatomy, NCIS, Family Guy, The Office, CSI, American Idol, The Amazing Race, The Real World, Dancing With the Stars, Lost, One Tree Hill, 90210, Sportscenter, Scrubs, 24, America's Got Talent, So You Think You Can Dance, Extreme Makeover.

Favorite Movies: Old School, 40 Year Old Virgin, Wedding Crashers, Talladega Nights, Superbad, The Hangover, The Taking of Pelham 123, The Proposal, Year One, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince.

Favorite Books: reading?? What's that??
Favorite Quotations:
Dance like no one is watching, Love like you'll never be hurt, Sing like no one is listening, Live like it's heaven on earth.
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."
- Confucius-

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

About Me:
I met a guy on the red eye
He spotted my guitar
and said what do you do?
I said, I sing for a living,
Country music mixed with
a little rock and a little blues
He said I'm sorry
but I've never been crazy
'bout that twang and trains and hillbilly thing
What ever made you want to sing stuff like that?
I just looked at him and laughed and said

cause it's songs about me
and who I am
songs about loving and living
and good hearted women and family and God
yeah they're all just
songs about me
songs about me

So I offered him tickets
I said you'll see what I mean
if you show up tonight
he said I doubt you'll change my opinion
I'll be kind of busy, but hey man, I'll try

Then later on when we finished our songs
about scars and cars and broken hearts
I saw him, he was standing there
right next to the stage
and he shouted
man you were right
it was like you sang those

songs about me
and who I am
songs about loving and living
and good hearted women and family and God
yeah they're all just
songs about me
songs about me

So I'll just keep on singing
'til I hear the whole world singing those

songs about me
and who I am
songs about loving and living
and good hearted women and family and God
yeah they're all just
songs about me
songs about me

Groups: 1,000,000 Strong Against the new Facebook, Six Degrees of Separation the Facebook Experiment, 1,000,000 strong for Barack Obama, Lost my phone, need everyone's Phone #, I Hate Facebook The Group, Nickelback Fanclub, (Insert Your Name) is the best name ever, Stop World Hunger The Facebook Experiment, 1,000,000 strong for (Insert Generic Cause)....

Too Much is Too Much

Dammit, I've got plenty of material and I've just been too lazy to post. But today is going to be very impassioned, because I absolutely HATE what I'm writing about.

Pop Evil

If you don't know who they are, count yourself lucky. I only know one song they ever wrote, but it is among my least favorite songs ever. Have you ever heard the song "100 in a 55"? Hopefully not. First off, this song is continuing this unpleasant trend of groups that are trying to consider themselves "Rock", but instead are some form of hybrid of who knows what (at least they're not Nickelback...I'll get to them some other day).

Anyway, I don't have a whole lot to say about this, but this song has the distinction of having one of the worst song lyrics I've EVER heard. "Too much is never enough, and too little is never enough." Does anyone else see why the hell I have a problem with this lyric. Actually, looking at it right in front of me, it isn't one of the worst lyrics I've ever heard...IT IS THE WORST LYRIC I'VE EVER HEARD!!!

How the hell is "too much" never enough. By definition, "too much" is actually more than enough, so that lyric doesn't make sense. And then they follow it up with the real winner, "Too little is never enough." NO SHIT!!! Too little isn't enough because once again, by definition, too little is NOT ENOUGH!!! FUCK!! Pop Evil has joined the ranks of Nickelback and Pink Floyd as groups whose music I can identify by the first few notes of a song, allowing me to turn that shit off before more than 5 seconds have elapsed. I hate that song, and every time I hear it I am tempted to call into the radio station and question why the hell they would play something so idiotic.

On another note, I hate songs that use the term "Rock and Roll" in their lyrics, and Pop Evil wins another point by throwing that one in there a few times. I don't know why I don't like it, but when I think of the good, classic 80's and even 90's music I listen to, I just think "Rock" and not "Rock and Roll." Very few songs can use that term within their lyrics effectively...though I can think of 1 or 2 that have. 100 in a 55 is not one of those songs.

Why So Disturbing?

Has anyone seen the new White Castle commercials about the pulled pork sandwich? If not, let me describe it for you. It basically takes place in a gentleman's club, or strip joint to put in layman's terms. It focuses on two guys, one of whom is feeling "The Crave", watching the main stage where an exotic dancer is doing her best "Flashdance" impression. The catch? The exotic dancer is a FUCKING PIG!!! Literally it's a woman (hopefully) dressed up in a giant pink pig costume. Her performance ends with the infamous image of her sitting in a chair, back arched, chest upward, and dumping a bucket of water on her prone body. Only instead of a bucket of water, it's BBQ sauce.

So my description basically makes it sound like a somewhat humorous take on what some call a classic 80's movie. Why does this disturb me, you ask? Well, why the hell doesn't it disturb you?!?!?!?!

That damn pig is the type of costumed monstrosity that can give kids nightmares. The entire commercial is filmed in a very dark backdrop, and there's virtually no speech, just the creepy white castle "Crave" music playing over and over while the damn pig is dancing to it. It's just plain frightening, seriously. Not to mention that there is a strong possibility that the person under that pig mask is, in fact, a dude. I'm not certain of that, but I can't imagine White Castle was able to convince an actual stripper to dress up in a pink pig costume and dance around before dumping a bucket of BBQ sauce on herself. But then again, maybe they did. I truly hope there is a woman under that pig costume, because I would not be surprised in the least if there is some guy out there who has watched this video over and over again, and gotten off on it.

The worst part of the whole deal for me is the fact that whenever I go to watch the Angry Video Game Nerd on Cinemassacre.com, I am forced to watch a 15 second clip of this commercial before every video. And since I've been on a huge AVGN kick lately, I have had to watch the commercial far too many times. I am sure that one night that fucking pig will sneak into my dreams, causing me to wake up in a cold sweat, possibly smelling BBQ sauce. I enjoy White Castle in moderation, but this commercial made me wary of them.

Has anyone tried the pulled pork yet? Despite my misgivings about their advertising, I'm still interested to taste it.

Who is the Bigger A$$....?

Over the weekend I was driving down Bardstown Road here in Louisville, and I witnessed an act of ignorance so inspiring that I had to acknowledge it in some way.

As a bit of background, I'll try to describe Bardstown Road. Some people who know St. Louis and a little bit about Louisville compare Bardstown to the U-City Loop. While I can definitely see the comparisons, think it has a little different feel. You would have to have experienced both many times over to understand what I'm talking about. But basically it's a 4-lane road with bars, music shops, and locally owned businesses lining either side of the road. It's a place where people drive, park their cars, and walk up and down the area on nice days, and most weekends you will see hundreds of walkers frequenting the restaurants, bars and shops.

So there's your history, now for a little bit of daily inspiration. I was driving down Bardstown (actually I was the passenger) on Saturday and was stuck in Bardstown Road traffic (bumper to bumper, but generally moving). On the weekends, the right lanes are supposed to be essentially off limits for drivers because they are made into parking lanes. However, if you are lucky you may get a long stretch where there are no cars parked and can jump into the right lane for a bit.

After several minutes of this traffic, I noticed a gap on the right side of about a quarter mile with no cars parked. Generally if this happens, the only people who get over into the lane are those who have to make a right turn during that stretch, or those who are going to park along the open space. On this occasion, a driver about 3 cars behind us decided that this would be a good opportunity to jump over, pass up about 8-9 cars, and then jump back into the driving lane, most likely cutting a few people off in the process.

The car got over and started moving. Right after it had passed my car, however, it noticed an obstruction in the road. A biker (bicycle, not motorcycle) and his friend were sitting in the lane, completely blocking it. The car sped up toward the biker, expecting him and his friend to move. Instead, they stood their ground, knowing the car shouldn't be in that lane to begin with. The car continued to inch further forward, obviously threatening them in an attempt to intimidate them into moving. Still, they stood their ground, staring straight into the face of the driver. While I couldn't see the driver, I know the bikers did nothing but stand their ground. The did not make rude facial expressions, they didn't curse, and they didn't make any hand gestures. The car, obviously fed up at this point, tried to get back into the left lane, but every one of the cars the driver had passed refused to let him in. As I passed the biker and his friend, now roughly 6 inches from the front bumper of the car, I couldn't hide the broad grin on my face. Actually, I was laughing so hard tears were nearly rolling down my face. The biker's friend looked into my car and saw me laughing so hard, smiled back, and just kind of shrugged at me like, "I don't know what the hell this guy's problem is." And while I just kept laughing, I think if I could go back to that moment I would probably applaud these two mens' actions.

Now this story begs just one question: Who was the bigger asshole in this situation?

Golden BS

I've made a recent discovery that has me rather disturbed. I was excited to purchase a box of Froot Loops on sale a few weeks ago. I'm generally not a huge fan of the cereal, but once in a blue moon the craving for a a fruit-flavored circle of grains and sugars arises within me, so I made the purchase.

I didn't look too closely at the box when I bought it, but once I went to pour some cereal the next morning I noticed an unpleasant new cereal piece in my box: Golden Bars. WTF!!!

Last I checked, I had purchased a box of Froot LOOPS!! I didn't sign on for golden bars!! Those aren't even circular in the least. I can understand throwing in another flavor of loops, as Kellogg's has a tendency to change up their cereals on a semi-regular basis. They added new marshmallow shapes to Lucky Charms, made Vanilla/Chocolate Cocoa Puffs (kind of an abomonation in itself)...but now this shit. I don't want bars in my Froot Loops...I want LOOPS in my Froot Loops!! Why not start throwing "Z's" in my CheeriO's, or put dried apricots in my Raisin Bran!!!

This is just another idiotic way for a corporation to grab kids' attention and try to get them to nag the shit out of their parents to try the new form of Froot Loops. Golden Bars!! Why not make them golden LOOPS, geniuses?? Kellogg's, you can kiss my ass!!!

Why is it that....(Part 2)

Why is it that when you are going to have to take a hit when shopping, it's going to be a big hit? Here's what I mean. I am able to get off pretty cheaply shopping because I buy a lot of cheap, crappy food. I'm fine with that, it's how I get by right now with a limited budget. But it seems that all of the major grocery purchases I ever have to make come up all at once. My more expensive purchases are laundry detergent, dog food, contact solution, and toilet paper. Each of these can run in excess of $10, which isn't much but when you are budgeting for a lot less each week, it's rough. The next time I shop, I will have to buy all of the above. So laundry detergent ($12), contact solution (I exaggerated, it's like $6), dog food ($30) and toilet paper ($10...buy this shit in bulk). There's almost $60 already, and I need each of these things. That doesn't even include food. Looks like I don't eat this week.

Why is it that people complain about the weather regardless of the season. It's been in the mid 80's here in Louisville, and I believe a bit warmer in St. Louis, for the last few days. That's perfection for me. But other people are constantly complaining that it's too hot. Well, wait until late June, and then we'll give you hot, assholes. These are the same people who were complaining when it was below 20 degrees in January. Here's my take, pick a season and enjoy it. I love the heat...blistering, sweltering heat. If it's 95 degrees and humid, you'll find me out running, choosing courses that take me by public sprinklers, fountains, and sometimes even pools. I can't get enough of summer. So when winter comes, I bitch and complain. And I believe that's my right. I make fun of people complaining about the summer heat and tell them to get a damn tissue and cry about it. If you're going to complain about the weather all year round, find a place where the seasons don't change. Then you'll be like me and will only be complaining about one weather pattern...and can't we all use more people in the world like me?

Why is it that I can't post regularly on this damn blog anymore. I'm going to make these posts a regular part of the site, and I will stop numbering them after this one. Keep reading and I'll do my best to keep writing...mydik.

Why is it that....?

Why is it that whenever you have a lot going on in your life, you are more motivated to get things done. It seems that if there's a time where I'm busy as hell, with very little time to myself, I am more motivated to do the tasks in my life that need doing. For example, when I would work 50+ hour weeks at work last year, I would also be motivated to get my schoolwork done well in advance. I'm not the busiest person in the world, but I have a lot on my plate. I recently quit my job and now work part time, but I also coach track, go to school full time, and am a serious runner who runs hard on a nearly daily basis. However, since I quit my job, things have gone downhill. I procrastinate more on my schoolwork, don't put as much into my coaching, and don't run as much. On days I work, I get my schoolwork done, try to run, and look forward to coaching. It's incredible how my life is black and white like this. I have a very large "To-do" list of things I need to get done by May 1 (incidentally one of my favorite days of the year). Instead of getting started on this list this week during my spring break, I haven't even written the damn list!! I've been pretty much worthless the last two days. Hopefully things can change for me, but it will take effort on my part, and I don't know if I have to motivation to put forth that effort.

Why is it that when you have roommates, you all seem to buy the same groceries at the same time? Two days ago, we were out of milk, trash bags, and paper towels. As of today, we still don't have paper towels, but we have 3 packages of trash bags and 4 (yes 4!!!!!) gallons of milk. We have an entire shelf taken up with milk right now. The pathetic thing is that it will be gone by week's end, and we will probably go shopping again on Saturday for more before the $1 half gallon sale ends (yes, that 4 gallons is made up of 8 half gallon containers...fantastic).

Why is it that dogs eat their own shit? I don't know. Actually, I don't think dogs eat their own shit, they hate the smell. They like the smell (and seemingly the taste) of other dogs' shit. We have 3 dogs at some points in this house, and they feast on each others' feces. We've done a pretty good job of weaning them of this habit, but it's definitely still a work in progress. The only time I let my dog lick me now is when he hasn't been outside on his own for hours.

A Change, and Things That Are Just The Best

I've decided to try to focus more on posting more often, and making them shorter instead of the long posts I've been putting up lately. I'll post short as much as possible, and when inspiration strikes, they will become long.

So today I will begin with something that will become an ongoing series on this Blog: Things That Are Just The Best. What does this mean, you ask? Just what it sounds like...kind of. One of the most common expressions to go around my house is, "That's just the best." To what do we say this expression? Anything that is indeed NOT the best. So here we go with the inaugural list of thing that are "Just The Best."

1) Fat chicks who are so portly that they can be 8 months pregnant and not look any different than when they are not with child.

2) The hardened food particles you find on your dishes after running them through the dishwasher.

3) Toilet paper that is so thin that it rips as you wipe, leaving you with pungent fingers.

4) Having to take a crap when there is no toilet paper in the house, and instead of running out to buy TP, taking your shit and then cleaning up by taking a shower and shampooing your ass.

5) Volkswagon Jettas.

Cars and Anger

You know, I've gone through life and had dozens, if not hundreds, of conversations of what I would do if I was rich. Most of these are pretty reasonable ideas I've had, including buying a decent house but one that's not too big, but with a lot of property. Also, I've thought of who I would give money to, and whether or not I would work. And since most of this stuff is boring and practical, I'll focus on some of the other ideas I've had. Right now I'll just talk about one but maybe I'll throw these out every once in awhile just for shits and laughs (I don't giggle, but I do shit and laugh).

I've decided that when I'm rich I will spend however much money I deem necessary on shitty cars. What would I do with these shitty cars, you ask. Easy, I'd crash them into shit. What kind of shit? Whatever the hell I want!! Mainly I would focus on idiots. This idea came to me today when I was driving down a narrow drive in an apartment complex and had to swerve quite sharply to avoid a UHaul that had backed up to unload shit. Of course, it had backed up into some barriers that were set up for the sole purpose of keeping idiots from backing their UHauls up into that very area!!! So instead, these idiots backed up until the barriers stopped them, with the front of the UHaul sticking out and blocking roughly 70% of the drive in the complex. If I'd had one of these shitty cars I wanted to buy, I'd have rammed the fucker right into that damn truck, hopefully damaging the truck and the furniture inside. I would do the same thing to people who take 10 minutes to parallel park, people who double-park, anyone who ever cuts me off, and of course, Volkswagon Jettas. I would also ram the shit out of people's cars who leave their shopping carts in the middle of the parking lot instead of walking them 50 feet to the nearest cart rack. That's just the height of laziness in my mind, and these people deserve to have their cars totaled by a rich asshole like I would be. I probably hold a grudge here because I worked at a grocery store in my teen years.

Speaking of shopping carts, one of my favorite shopping cart stories (because I'm sure people just have dozens of these in their arsenals) is the time my friends and I saw a woman get angry that a shopping cart was near her car on her way into the store. So once we saw her walk into the store, we proceeded to surround her car with 10 shopping carts. Our big regret on this one was the fact that we didn't wait around to see her reaction.

Anyway, getting back to crashing cars into shit, you may be thinking that if I crashed a bunch of different shitty cars into other people's vehicles, I'll have a bad driving record, and fucking high insurance rates. Well who gives a shit, I'm rich!!! Money should be the last of my worries. I guess the main drawback of this plan is the fact that my insurance would end up paying for these peoples' damaged vehicles. And while that wouldn't be a big deal financially, it would pain me to know they had the satisfaction of getting their cars repaired at my expense. Of course that would all be forgotten when I remember that by crashing into their cars and fucking up their lives for a few days, I'm getting a cheap laugh at their expense.

Ice

The great Louisville Ice Storm of 2009 is now a thing of the past. There are still remnants all over the city, but for the most part everything is back to normal. Normal, that is, except for those 7,000 homes in Louisville still without power, the ice still on some roads, the countless downed tree branches, and the damaged cars all over the city.



This storm was one of the most insane things I've ever witnessed. To start, this was the second largest power outage in the history of Louisville. The first occurred back in September when we felt the wrath of Hurricane Ike. On both occasions my house dealt with downed tree branches and no power. I believe both times we didn't have power for about 4-5 days. I know this time we lost power at about 3:00 AM Wednesday morning and got it back some time late Sunday morning. Of course, it was cold as balls outside and at one point it was 38 degrees inside my house. I actually slept there, in the basement which was somehow warmer than upstairs, for 2 nights before putting my dog in a kennel and crashing elsewhere. On the plus side, all we had to do with our milk was leave it on the counter and it stayed cold...seriously.



I went running in Louisville Sunday morning. Remember now, the storm hit Monday night and most of Tuesday. On Sunday during this run, I ran through probably 2 miles of un-plowed roads. And some of these roads were well-travelled and hilly. Now I understand ice is a pain in the ass to clean up and if the weather stays cold it's even harder, but I don't think there's any excuse for any street in metro Louisville to be a sheet of ice 4 DAMN DAYS after the storm!!!! Once again, this city shows how unprepared it is for winter weather, despite all its big talk and pictures of mounds of salt lying in wait. Well, I'll give credit to our electric crews for doing their best to restor power while the lines were covered in ice.



Last time we had branches down in our house, we got quite ignorant with them. Instead of hauling them in a truck to the local tree branch dropoff that was set up, we chose to drop a few branches down the stree in the yard of a neighbor who had an entire tree down in his yard. We figured he wouldn't notice. We may do the same again, except we have a lot more branches down this time. We stall can't walk a direct line from our front door to our cars in the driveway. Listening to tree branches slide down our roof and into our front and back yards every 10 minutes or so on Tuesday night was a great way to soothe ourselves to sleep.

All in all it was a great week. I credit this week, especially the two nights I spent in the cold house, for my current sore throat and congestion that is ailing me. Thank you Louisville, for your exciting and ever-changing weather patterns!!

The Big Box

Another event in the eating decathlon is complete. This one was easily my favorite, and I think Ryan and Drew agree with me. We did our Taco Bell challenge. Instead of doing 10 tacos as originally planned, we did a Big Box Value Meal. Has anyone had one of these? They are fantastic, and I believe they are ever-evolving. This version included a regular taco, a bean burrito, an order of cinnamon twists, a 32 oz. drink, and the new Black Jack taco (more on this tomorrow). The race itself was one of the more exciting ones. We were originally not going to include the drink, but we changed that at the last minute, and it really turned out to be the game-changer.

We started out quickly, all on different foods. Me on the taco, Drew on the Burrito, and Ryan on the Cinnamon twists. I personally felt like I led most of the way, devouring both tacos and then eating the burrito in about 4 bites. I started the cinnamon twists while Drew and Ryan still had a bit over 1 taco left. However, they had drank more of their Cokes during the actual eating that I had. I instead focused on the food and tried to chug the drink at the end. Instead, they caught and passed me when we were all trying to finish the drink. Ryan won by the slimmest of margins, with Drew right behind. I gave in when they had finished and decided to enjoy my Coke over the next few minutes. None of us felt 0ver-full at all and we agreed it was the best challenge yet. I now have a 2 point lead over Drew and a 6 point lead over Ryan. Should be an interesting finish.

Another Post of Ranting

I've fallen off the wagon of posting so I decided to add some gibberish to my pool of thoughts on this site. I've actually had a lot of time to watch people lately, and I've made some observations that anger, annoy, and amuse me. What do you think?

Why do people insist on backing into parking spaces. I don't really know why this annoys me so much, but it seems to me like it's more difficult to back into a parking spot than to back out of it. Maybe I'm wrong, but I get fed up when I have to wait for someone to pull past a spot then back up (normally badly) into the spot they just passed up. Maybe someone can give me some insight into this one, but it's annoying enough to me to ruin my mood for an hour or so.

As a follow-up to that, I feel it's necessary to make a plea to people: Don't try to parallel park if you don't know how. There's plenty of spots elsewhere, so don't hold up traffic while you spend 5 minutes adjusting your car because you don't know what you're doing. Proper parallel parking should be done in 3 moves, not 15. Maybe I get annoyed by this because parallel parking is one of about 3 things in this life I can do well (I'm still trying to find the other 2). But if you can't do something, don't hold up other people because of your incompetence. Admit defeat and move on.

My college alma-mater is currently ranked #5 in Division 2 basketball, it's highest rank ever. Its last two home games have been in front of sellout crowds of 2,600: roughly equal to the attendance of Rams games at the end of this season. I wasn't in St. Louis, but how many Rams games were blacked out this year?

Speaking of football, St. Louis is trying to get a MLS team. While I'm all for that and think it will be great for the city, which truly deserves a franchise, I can't help but remember the last time I went to a soccer game in St. Louis. It was indoor soccer, and it's the first time I've seen only 500 people in a 20,000 seat arena...eerie to say the least.

The weather here has sucked over the past month, in both St. Louis and Louisville. My barometer on weather is based on what I wear when I run. So far in the past 3 weeks I've run in running pants, 2 shirts and a jacket, and a hat and gloves in one run. I've also run in running shorts and no shirt several times. I believe the range of temperatures we've seen is 3 degrees (-10 wind chill) all the way up to 68 degrees. But really, I think I would be bored living in a climate where the temperature stayed steady year-round. This just adds some excitement and unpredictability to life.

What turned out to be the most enjoyable event in the eating decathlon occurred a few hours ago. I'll post an update in a day or two.