Sunday, September 27, 2009

The Stereotypical Facebook Profile: Conclusion


I just kept putting off this post because I always do better posting on the fly and not really planning what I'm going to write. So somehow, knowing what I needed to write actually deterred me from writing...F'ed up, I know.

So I guess I ended with TV shows, which always angered me. But what people put for their favorite movies pisses me off almost as much. First off, there are several movies on everyone's lists, Old School, 40 Year Old Virgin, Wedding Crashers, Talladega Nights, Superbad,I have a serious problem with people who see a brand new movie once and claim it's their "favorite movie of all time." Screw that!! All of my favorite movies are at least 3 years old, meaning I've had plenty of time to watch them, analyze them, and compare them to other classics on my list of favorite movies. I really enjoyed "The Dark Knight", but it's not my favorite movie. I've seen it twice. Can I really call a movie I've seen twice my favorite? However, when looking at the list I put on the "Stereotypical Facebook Profile", one would have to look closely to see the real humor. The last several of those movies hadn't even been released when I posted that profile, including: The Hangover, The Taking of Pelham 123, The Proposal, Year One, Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Some people are stupid enough to put a movie down as their favorite based solely on hype and trailers. Idiots!! One thing I will say is that I will make an exception for "The Hangover" because that movie was phenomenal.

Favorite books. I get so damn pissed when I see people making fun of reading on their Facebook profile. Do people not realize that reading a damn book every once in a while will keep your mind sharp, and is a great substitution to all that TV that they supposedly don't watch. Don't make fun of reading just because you don't have the intelligence to sit down with a book. There are people in this world who still do it, and they're smarter than you!!

Favorite quotes: I don't really remember why I put those first two quotes other than the fact that most people put something stupid that is totally unrelated to their own lives just to make themselves look deep. Then they always throw in a poem or an entire damn song, again to make them look like deep thinkers!! Guess what, assholes?? You look like idiots putting entire songs for your "favorite quotes." A quote is an excerpt, not an entire song. If I had the space, I would put my favorite quote as the entire script for "Back to the Future" on my Facebook profile just to top all those deep thinking assholes and their favorite quotes.

About me: Another place to put an entire song and make you look smart and deep. Once again, you just look like an asshole. Just put a short description or a link to your MySpace page or something. Don't pretend that Kenny Chesney or Taylor Swift wrote an entire song just for you. Whatever song you put that supposedly describes you for your "About me" section was written for the sole purpose of making money, and is in no way about you. I thought it was fitting that the song I used was in fact, "Songs About Me" by Trace Adkins. (No I did not know off the top of my head that it was Trace Adkins, I had to look it up. I do not enjoy country music).

Finally, Facebook Groups. This was kind of fun to write because there are so many damn groups that everyone is a part of. All of the 1,000,000 strong groups, or the "6 degrees of separation" groups are amusing. My favorite, however, are the groups people join that basically say, "I Hate Facebook." Why the hell would you be a member of Facebook, only to join a group that says you hate it. You don't hate Facebook, otherwise you would not spend all of you supposedly limited free time (that time not spend "chillin', watchin' TV, and hangin' with friends) on Facebook.

So I hope this was enlightening to all of my loyal followers. Sorry for the long delays. I will work on doing a better job of making some shorter, more regular posts. Good day to all of my followers.