Ike

I feel like the entire country experienced the fallout from Hurricane Ike. I know for a fact that both Louisville and St. Louis were ravaged, but in entirely different fashions. On Sunday, as the hurricane made its way north, it hit St. Louis with fairly high winds and more rain than the city has seen in quite some time. I believe I heard 4 inches fell in the span of a few hours. This caused flooding all over the city, including in places I've never heard of having this problem before. For example, I was told the corner of Manchester and Hanley was underwater. What!?!?! That's what I said. I didn't even know there was water anywhere nearby, but somehow this area flooded.

Meanwhile, in Louisville, we got the high winds but no rain. However, we got gusts of up to 75 mph, with average winds in the 50 mph range for a few hours straight. Now I've never considered myself much of a risk-taker but I made one of the dumber decisions of my life on Sunday afternoon. I chose to go running at the height of these massive winds, with trees all around me. So I made my way to a park and ran 7 miles, all the while being covered in blowing dust and debris, and waiting for a tree limb or street sign to crack me in the side of the head.

The aftermath of these high winds left roughly 300,000 households and businesses in the area without power...myself and my work included. As I write this it is Wednesday morning, and my house is still without power, and my work unfortunately got power at about 6:30 this morning. I think there are still about 150,000 places without power right now, and they are guessing it could be up to 2 weeks (from Sunday) by the time everything is restored.

So while I sit at night in my dark house and read with a flashlight, while watching movies on my laptop until the battery dies, one very disturbing thought crosses my mind on a regular basis: if we are this reliant on electricity and cannot use anything that needs it, what would happen if toilets were powered by electricity?

I know that I had to piss in the dark on the very first day we lost power but was able to flush. But people are freaking out so badly right now it is insane. You can't buy batteries, flashlights, or candles to light your house. Stores are also sold out of ice so you can't cool your food. Even gas stations are shutting down: some because they don't have power and others because they are out of gas. People are lined up in stores and gas stations all over the city trying to find a way to live their lives. What if they couldn't use their toilets either? Would the lines at restaurants, stores, libraries, and even churches be out the door because there are thousands of people around the city who can't take a shit? Would the city line up portolets in parks for everyone to use? Would people just begin to go in their neighbors' yards? Think of how many times you walk into a room when your power is out and flip a light switch without thinking...just out of habit. How many people would automatically go use their toilet, only to realize, too late, that they can't flush it? Then they would have to deal with a rotting turd cooking up in their bowl for several days. The smell would be just awful. So all of you scientists out there, or amateur inventors, if you see blueprints come across your desk for an electric toilet, I have just three words for you: JUST SAY NO!!